That Ice Queen Called Me
When I was scrolling my friends list here, I decided to make a testimonial for one that I haven’t seen in years. I usually maske testimonials in a jiffy, but when I clicked this person’s name I went suddenly numb. Why I am doing this? What for? What’s the use?
A colleague at my office once said that I was rather hard to strike up a friendship with. Why? Well, my habits are strange for one (I sometimes go to work with no make-up on, and I often go to work outrageously early). I don’t do "girl-talk" usually. I like to read, and I sometimes can’t understand why girls fall for a guy on a poster whose qualifications for such adoration are a set of six-pack abs, arm muscles, clear skin, etc.,etc.,etc. I don’t like to be around lots of people too. And I heard from my sister that someone told her that I was a sort of "Ice Queen"—someone who is cold and aloof.
My "Ice Queen" image oftentimes filters down to my relationships with my family and relatives. I don’t usually attend gatherings, and when I do I don’t talk much at all. I am the quintessential cold turkey when something bad happens. I remember when an aunt died. I was her favorite niece, and I haven’t seen her in 8 years! Yet when I heard about her death, I hardly shed a tear.
I don’t know. I sometimes don’t know why I am like this, a being insensitive to things around her. A person who had been devoted to building walls around her, and now is trying to break them down with difficulty since the walls are much too thick. I’m sorry if I had been so cold when I even know that I shouldn’t. I’m sorry that I run away whenever you all try to reach out to me. I’m sorry……T-T
I have been so insensitive. I am ashamed. I bow my head down to all of you here. I am humbled by the fact that a lot of you still want to reach out to me after all that’s been said and done. I will be better, you’ll see. I thought that I was destined to be invisible all my life, and I recently got the shock of my life when I found that someone out there loves me, in spite of myself. I cried like I never did for a very long time.
I hate myself.
December 23rd, 2006 at 2:19 am
to my queen,
what the term ‘ice queen’ mean ?
its the person who had a cold blood, someone who cares 4 no one, you like 2 spend most of your time alone, thats not wrong, thats a part of a romance, but they cant see.
your friend who said that about you is only giving him self an excuse 2 explain his failure approaching you , he said that about u, he is no longer a friend, you love your family ,your parents , your sisters, an most of all , you love your boyfriend, if you are capable of love , then you are no ice queen, he said one right thing about you , you are a queen, my lovely queen
December 27th, 2006 at 4:30 am
I’m called Ice Queen too.. but I think it’s because of another reason.
But well… May I kiCk er buTT for ya?
;+
December 27th, 2006 at 4:33 am
Oh uh… its not YOU that I mean ok.. it’s that bad ego… you’re a nice person.
Dont worry too much. You’re a very nice woman.
December 28th, 2006 at 12:05 am
hahaha, go ahead, you’ll make my day