I’m Half, So What!!!!!
When I chatted with an online friend about my mixed ancestry, she said "Wow, you really are that?" I’m sure she said it in sheer admiration. Having a Muslim father and a formerly Catholic mother is one thing. Seeking acceptance in society is another kettle of fish.
So I am what the people around me call a "half". They can automatically notice it in my looks ("Hey, you don’t look like you’re from here!"), they can guess it from the way I speak the local dialect ("Ah so you didn’t grow up here! You don’t sound like it."), and of course they can notice it in my ideas ("That’s not the way they do it here, dear."). The list can go ad infinitum. Ok so I can’t hide, but I see no reason to do it.
With my Christian cousins they accept me as I am. In fact I believe I am closer to them than with my father side cousins. Check my phonebook and you’ll see. But let’s face it. I haven’t seen them in 8 years or more. I frankly would like to spend vacations with them someday. I am more easily accepted in mainstream Christian society because of the fact that I don’t fit in their stereotype of a typical Muslim in the country.
Now for the harder part. In the society I now find myself in, I and others in the same boat are subjected to many direct and subtle instances of discrimination. A lot of "half" boys couldn’t get married to "pure blooded" girls because of the fact that their mother is a Christian or just a Muslim revert. Most people here particularly the traditionalist ones don’t take kindly to mixed marriages and "half" kids. I remember a sister of mine having a SMS friend (textmate if you like) who suddenly stopped texting her when she said yes to his question, "Are you a ‘half’?" What’s wrong with us, huh?
However there are a few things that can be gained by just being a "half". For one thing, we’re not that timid. We are a bit more brave because everything (well almost) is against us and that we have to fight (well, a little) for what we want. We aren’t ignorant of things around us because we get to live in two worlds. We know the worth of equality because we know how to be discriminated against in a narrow-minded society. Pehaps best of all we can fight better against traditional customs that aren’t even Islamic because we’re not wholly part of the tribe and do not practice them much of the time.
So much for that. I’m half, and I’m glad to be one.
